Season 2 Episode 002

Stop Blocking Your Own Success: Mastering Your Inner Champion with Dorice Horenstein

Dorice Horenstein

Are your own thoughts holding you back from your first million? In this episode of Women’s Million Dollar Conversations, Alice Tang sits down with international keynote speaker, author, and mental fitness expert Dorice Horenstein to uncover the “saboteurs” that interfere with our success.
 
Dorice shares her powerful journey from a 30-year career in education to becoming a “Mental Fitness” powerhouse, helping leaders move from “Oy to Joy”. Learn why negative emotions are actually helpful alerts, how your “energy radius” affects everyone around you, and the practical steps to rewire your brain for abundance.

Episode 064

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"So many people don't already know that they have a champion built inside them."

Dorice Horenstein - international keynote speaker, author, and mental fitness expert

Clips

Mastering Your Inner Champion with Dorice Horenstein

Welcoming Dorice Horenstein

What's the value of money?

Scarcity Mindset

The ability to change our minds

From Oy to Joy

Empty your cabinet

Measure your energy

Understand Saboteur Interference

Your inner champion

Let a "No" channel you to a "Yes"

Transcripts

Dorice: I love that you said the word energy. Oh my god, this is this is a beautiful nugget of importance is the energies that we bring literally neuroscientifically spreads out around our body six feet radius. Okay, your energy that comes. So if you come with an energy that of scarcity, energy that constrict you, energy that is negative, energy that other people can mirror that, you have to be really really aware of what we bring.

Alice: Good morning. I’m Alice Tang. Welcome to
Alice: Women’s Million Dollar Conversation season two. Today we sitting down with one of my friends in the National Speakers Association. Her story is going to be inspiring. She is an international keynote speaker and author for the book Moments of the Heart and Be Your Own Champion. She is interviewed by the local television station and two time million dollar round table annual conference speaker. Let’s welcome today’s guest Dorice Horenstein.

Dorice: Thank you. I appreciate being here. Thank you for your friendship.

Alice: This conversation is about women, about empowering women, giving them hope, giving them the resource to get to their first million dollars. So our guests like yourself, you have saved, earned or sold a million dollars. So we are talking about the journey too and the craziness that you have conquered and the good nuggets that you’re giving to our audience. So are you ready Dorice?

Dorice: I am so ready and so excited and I loved when you added the integrity piece of the ways to get to the million is different. It’s by earning it. It’s by investing it. It’s by selling products and it’s all about the investment in yourself.

Alice: Of course. Of course. Money is only one type of wealth. But we all know that without money we do nothing. So that’s today’s focus. What’s the value of money for you?

Dorice: It for me money is freedom. And I
Dorice: remember a while back when I was in the education business for 30 years, 16 years running a school, I didn’t feel free. I felt that I was not following my heart mission and I think at that time scarcity was the predominant thought in my head like I didn’t have enough enough money enough time enough resources and I felt this construction in my heart thinking what am I going to do next? How am I going to break the wall that I envision in front of myself? So, I think that was to me the value and still is freedom. Freedom to not only be who you are, but do what gives you the most impact, the most feeling of alignment with yourself.

Alice: I am 100% in agreement or maybe 120% in agreement with you. Being in the
Alice: financial industry, we help people to get to financial independence or freedom. But at the same time, a lot of us have a scarcity mindset. Even for the people that I know that they will not, no matter how they spend in their lifetime, they still have left over, they have this scarcity. And that’s why they choose to stay smaller and not to do great things. Because what good do we have if we die with how many millions of dollars and the world isn’t better until 45 years by the time and I I’m dead then probably some nonprofit can pick it up. So why not help the world during my lifetime?

Dorice: I remember the scarcity mindset with money because I think it comes from of course a place of fear. Do I have enough? Right? That is the nugget of it all. The freedom to the lack of freedom, the fear. And I I tell my kids, I have three older kids, and I tell my kids, don’t count on any money from me. I don’t want them to ever think that they’re going to get any money from me. Why? For two reasons. Number one, I want to live life fully. I don’t want to think I need to save all of this to give to my kids. No, maybe I will. Maybe it will happen. Maybe it doesn’t. But it’s living life to the fullest that it can be and doing it in a smart way by investing. The first million happened when I was 50 years old with all of our resource. 50 years old and it was intentional. Me and my husband together worked very strong in how do we save, how do we invest, how do we pay off mortgage, how do we do all of these that brings us freedom then to travel, to make renovation, to visit places in the world that we have never visited. Because when I was growing, we had plenty of love and little money. When I came to America, I came with one suitcase, $600 to my name. I always ask, what do I need to do to shift my mindset? What do I need to do in my rewiring of my own brain to look at money as a tool to achieve something rather than as a barrier? We hear a lot of language, you know, they are dirty rich, right? We’ve all heard that.

Alice: They don’t need to be dirty.

Dorice: Exactly. Exactly. But the connotation is not good. Not good. So I had to really watch the way people speak about money, the way I speak about money and slowly to change that narrative in my own brain.

Alice: I love it. Money is a tool to help us to achieve things. But what good does it do if we haul saved accumulated a lot and choose not to use it? Dorice: Yes. And I know a family that have reached more than what we have yet they live in a fashion that is constricting like they will not go travel they will not do experiences because they want to live it for the children from them I learned the lesson you live life now fully we all have worked so hard to get to where we are why shouldn’t we enjoy what we have

Alice: totally actually it’s not long ago that I discovered the book that I share with you die with zero and it was at the time when I have a few family members who were in not so good shape in health and so out of the blue it prompted me that life is short I changed my mind there is multiple ways to look at wealth when you achieve it like Doris
Dorice: You know what I love when you said I love when you said I changed my mind because isn’t that an amazing quality that we all have? The ability to change our mind if there is a willingness to see something bigger than what we have right now in front of us. Some people are they’re not willing to change. They say my way or the highway. I come to America, I don’t know what’s the highway.

Dorice: Isn’t it funny that two people that did not grow up in America are here having a conversation about American slang? She’s like, “My way or the highway.” Some people will say, “I bet you.” And I was like, “I do not bet for money. I play with it, but I do not gamble. I do not want to bet with my money. I rather invest my money.”

Alice: Very good. Very good. Actually you
Alice: prompted me to ask a question in my mind for a long time ever since I met you is we talk about change our mind right tell me a moment about from oi to joy especially regarding financial setback I’m sure you have one or two so now it’s time to be naked in front of the audience

Dorice: I didn’t think we’re going that way but I’ll do it for you just kidding so let’s just explain oi is when things are not okay. Things are not good. Right? We are in oi state. It comes from a Jewish background. And joy is the opposite of oi. Yet the word oi o y appears in joy. Meaning that sometimes out of the oi we can glean joy. One of the ois I had and I’ll be totally honest because I honesty is one of the pieces that for me builds integrity. I remember there was two months period where I got four rejections for a speaking engagement that I thought and believed were absolutely in the bag. Your head goes into a little bit assumption. Oh, I got it in the bag. This is going to be so great. I’m so excited. And within a two months period, those four engagements, each one separately, they don’t know each other. They emailed me back and they said, “We don’t think we can have you and because you’re too expensive for us.”

Dorice: It affected my equilibrium because I was so confident that I had it and then I didn’t. And it was thousands of dollars that I was planning on, which by the way, bad lesson, planning on it when it’s not yet in your bank. I did that.

Dorice: That was an oi. Then when I did my PQ, which is in my positive intelligence work, I tried to think about a little bit more curiosity. What exactly they didn’t aligned with besides the money? So I asked them, I asked them because it’s always deeper than just that. And they emailed me back and said, “Darice, you have so much integrity about your pay and you are worth it. We are just are not in a financial place of committing to this in our association and we want to save your name for next time when we can budget your price.”

Dorice: And then I realized something really important. They valued and respected my contribution. I thought at the beginning I’m like, “Oh my god, I’m not worth it.” But what I realized is that I was worth it and they knew that I was worth it and they respected it. I didn’t respect my own self. They respected it. Which brought me to okay, they may be right now not the right client for me.

Dorice: And then two months after that, I got my full pay and then some with another organization. It was as if God was telling me, Dice, stay in your lane. Keep on going forward. The right thing will come. And that was the joy. So I questioned myself. I felt doubt. I felt a little bit smaller. And then when I got the messages from them and got a chance to think about that and reflect, I realized my value is now my brand and I have to stick with it because it’s the right thing. Now, can I wave my fee when the outcome is bigger? Yes, of course. But lower my fee because of their needs is not what I was going to do. And so that is the one example that was an oi felt really sad to a joy when I got my event that I did receive the compensation that I believed I deserve.

Alice: Congratulations. I know you have spoke at the event that could pay your full fee and they all love you. What I’ve learned from this short story by you was that not only can we change our mind just like what Dorice has shared with us look at something that looks like a failure not so good event and change your mind and look at it with curiosity and said to ourselves wait what is the message for me so being able to be positively looking at a simile or at the moment negative thing actually provides opportunity in my world one of my very respected mentor has taught me
Alice: at that time we don’t have electronic files I’m just dinosaur old we have physical files photocopies of the statements my notes and everything so he opened the drawer he said if you have noroom in this cabinet drawer you cannot mentally feel free to invite more right clients. So for those who should go or who is troublemaker or who does not want to pay your fee, let them go. Empty your physical cabinet and then open up your mental space because that energy is going to attract the right people to come to you. You can’t even say yes because my calendar is full serving people who might not be the right match.
Dorice: I love that you said the word energy. This is a beautiful nugget of importance is the energies that we bring literally neuroscientifically spreads out around our body six feet radius. So if you come with an energy that of scarcity, energy that constrict you, energy that is negative, energy that other people can mirror, you have to be really aware of what we bring. I had to make sure to measure my energy because sometimes you are not happy with what’s going on around and yet you have to look at the place and say I need to show up as a leader as a producer as a visionary with the energies that other people could take and imitate and build. It’s so important to guard our energy, to nourish our energy, to spread our energy.
Alice: Beautifully said. Now, some of our audience who are women, they are watching us because they want to get some tips and I would say that some of them feel disconnected to the idea that they can even reach their first million dollars. What are some brain rewiring steps that you would recommend them to take and maybe share with the first one or two with them?

Dorice: I would ask them first to understand what saboturs stand in their way. When you say I can’t, I want I don’t believe I could. There is a saboteur interference. Whenever you feel a negative sense of emotions, this is good actually feeling to have because it alerts you that something is not aligning. If you want to make this but you think you can’t, you have a sabotur interference. So as a mental fitness expert, positive intelligence in particular, I would invite anyone, any woman there who is facing that challenge, that mindset to say, what is really blocking me? Is it a pleaser? Is it a controller? Is it a hyper achiever? What exactly is it? I don’t know what it is. But here is the good news. You can intercept that sabatur once you are aware of it, right? Because the first step is clarity. Have an awareness of it. Then do the exercises that will decrease it, that intercept it. The first one is the PQ, which is that connection to your breath, to your physical sense, to who you are right now. I do a PQ session every day at least 15 minutes. They could be five minutes, five minutes, five minutes. They can be two minutes, two minutes, two minutes. I am absolutely happy to gift anybody here little audio that they can use to intercept their saboturs. Once they intercept it, then ask yourself two questions. Number one, what is the fear I’m hiding behind? Okay. Number two, what can be possible for me if that fear did not exist? And then do the first step. If that fear did not exist, what will that be? That’s one step. Because all of our lives we achieve things by actually doing something. We don’t achieve things just by thinking about something or just by feeling about something. We achieve things by acting. So I don’t ask you to do all the nine miles of action, but what is one step that will get you closer to where you want to be? I love that.

Alice: Sometimes action brings courage. You can say, “I want courage.” But really is your action, one step of action that Dorice just mentioned. Think about the first step. Maybe first step is get up from the bed. And think about Mel Robbins how she developed the 5 4 3 2 1 is to get her up from the bed. Look at where she is today. Crazy good. We all love her. So it’s the first step. The first step creates momentum.

Dorice: And I will add to that which is brilliantly said. I will add that action that you do will create just a tiny bit more confidence in you. You took the first step. Now you have tiny bit confidence. Tomorrow do another tiny steps. Confidence is something that is built over time. No one is born already accomplished, already courageous, already confident, already a million dollars. You get there. It’s a journey.

Alice: That’s right. That’s right. This is a good place where we talked a little bit about your inner champion because that confidence probably is mentioned multiple times in your new book, right?

Dorice: Yes. My new book. I love my new book.
Dorice: Choose to be your own champion. So many people don’t know that they already have the champion built inside of them, but because they have so much saboteur interference, they can’t see themselves in that light. So this book’s purpose is to dust you off, clean you up, so your light can shine first within you and then for other people to see it, but first of course within you. And if you followed the steps which is an acronym, the choose is an acronym for clarity, honor your feelings, oneness with yourself, openness to option, strategize your success and eventually enactment which is the action piece that I am feeling extremely passionate and strong because life happens as a series of actions and those actions are habitual events that keeps on going. So what blocks you starts up here and then it penetrates into the feelings into your body into your actions. So that is what this book is about which I hope can inspire any woman to achieve the next level. I had a client she I met her as a matter of fact at the million-dollar round table talk in Dubai. She came to me afterwards and sometimes we assume that if you are in the million-dollar roundt you have no saboturs and no problems and she comes to me in Dubai and she starts crying and she tells me Dorice I felt that you were talking to me when you’re talking about your sabaturs it seems like I am engulfed with saboturs do you work oneon-one with people so I said yes so we start working in in And in the four months that we have had, it was like August to December. In January, she reaches out to me and she says, “Doris, I want you to know that this year was my biggest financial year ever. And it wouldn’t have been possible if I didn’t listen to your talk came to you because I realized how I am blocking myself from growing into the next phase into hiring the right people into realizing what is the environment that I’m in and how do I get out of it and there were so many changes that this amazing woman has done in four months. So of course my package is either three months or six months and at the beginning she took three months and now we’re a year-long process now. She’s the I’m not letting you go. The funny part I’m not a business coach. I’m not I am a mental fitness coach. But it’s interesting how your business can rise if you’re in alignment with your head and your heart and your brain and your gut and everything else. Amazing. I’m so happy when I see the impact, which by the way is, I think, another piece about the million-dollar mindset. We have to think about the impact that we make for other people. It’s not about us. It’s about the impact we make. So, when we say, “Am I worth it?” We need to change that around. It’s not about am I worth it, but is what I am offering solves other people’s problems? Is it helping them? And when it is helping them, then you know you’re worth it. Then you don’t ask yourself, am I worth it? Because you see it in writing that you’re worth it.

Alice: Wonderful. Now, all our guests are role
Alice: models like yourself. So, I ask you to do a little bit imagination as if I’m speaking at the million-dollar round table and you’re my audience. Imagine this. You are standing on the top of your million dollar mountain and you’re carrying a set of ropes and you are there to help the woman who’s down there looking up at you and say, “Dorice, I can relate to your story. Can you help me?” And I have the strongest desires in my heart and my eyes. I’m going to grab onto the rope. So as you are flowing down the rope to those women, how are you planning on reaching out to them?

Dorice: What a beautiful visualisation you just did because I was just thinking about this woman I was just mentioning before. But when I speak, I expose myself in a very vulnerable way. I tell people about, you know, how I left a job of 16 years heading education to not knowing what to do to having a lot of questions to try to get a job which I did. I tried to get a job like in an office and I was refused. I didn’t get the job. I thought why not people want me like I have so many good things. I was in a place of uncertainty my own self when I speak to those women who may not see what’s in front of them and may not see that the no that they receive is a way of channeling themselves to a yes. I want to find those women that need the emotional intelligence, that mental resilience, that idea that they are worth it. And they have to have the seed of I am a champion inside. They need to have that belief in themselves because if you do not have that belief in yourself and that trust that the universe work for you and not against you if you have that it doesn’t have to be big but it you have to have that gut in you saying I know that there is some things better I just don’t know how to access it. These women are the women that I want to impact, to serve, tolift.

Dorice: And most of the time, these women are younger than me. I’m going to be 60 in two weeks. These women are younger than me. And that’s beautiful. I want to help them uncover their own champion on the inside.

Alice: Very beautifully said. We are so grateful for your presence this morning, Doris.

Dorice: So I thank you for inviting me to share a conversation with whoever is listening now because those people may need that message that you and I discussed today. Thank you.

Alice: Absolutely. Absolutely. Thank you again. We’re so grateful for you.

Meet Dorice Horenstein

Dorice Horenstein
Dorice Horenstein is an international keynote speaker, author, and mental fitness expert who helps leaders solve the challenge of disconnection—so they can elevate human potential, performance, and engagement. With over 30 years of experience in education and leadership development, Dorice translates neuroscience and Positive Intelligence® into practical, immediately usable tools that help leaders manage stress, communicate with clarity, and lead with confidence in high-pressure environments. She has worked with leaders and teams across more than 50 organizations and global conferences, including MDRT, SHRM, Netflix, Thermo Fisher Scientific, and WFG. Dorice’s ongoing Mental Fitness training, grounded in Positive Intelligence® methodologies, delivers measurable results. According to Positive Intelligence program outcome data, participants report significant gains: 91% manage stress more effectively, 84% improve conflict management, 92% strengthen teamwork and collaboration, and 98% experience growth in emotional intelligence. She is the author of Moments of the Heart and Choose to Be Your Own Champion, and the creator of the AMEN to CORE and CHOOSE™ frameworks—practical models that help leaders lead with clarity, resilience, and purpose.
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